Your humorous/WTF/Holy crap moments here

[Wildmn34]

I was going to just post one thing in a nee thread but figured why not make a thread for a collection of good stories about encounters/experiences/etc that we have had in Skyrim.

Be warned that by the very nature of the thread there may be spoilers.

So, I'll start with my best one from last night.

I was going to the High Hrothgar. I was in the beautiful woods at the town before you go up the steps.

Off to my right I see a blue butterfly. "ooh pretty" So I start to chase it. It's a crafty little bugger, and does a brutal Barry Sanders double juke and gets past me. So, I turn to go back after it and get absolutely blasted by a bear. I never even had a chance to pull my ax, or a spell, or anything.

The only thing I managed to do was a little squeak of surprise and promptly dropped my controller and as I was picking it up watched this bear finish me off.

So, yes friends I was killed all because of a damn butterfly. I have learned my lesson and have an iron will not to repeat it. Unless of course I see something shiny once again and then the chase is on!

So, pull up a chair and a warm glass of mead and share your stories of times when you were less than stellar, and made judgments that a nine year old would scoff at.

I bid thee well, and look forward to your tales.

[grumpiercloud]

I was jumping around (Because I keep forgetting there isn't an acrobatics skill) and apparently my guy tripped on a skull and it shot up, hit him in the face and he died.

[PhR33kN SlAcK3r]

LoL...!! o_O

[MakoBallistic]

More of an 'Oh my god, im such a dumbass' moment than a WTF moment, but here it is...

I was doing the first main quest for the College of Winterhold to get my mage training or whatever, i was down in the tunnels and came across a door, with 2 statues with symbols above them either side of it. So i thought 'Ok, match the symbols, pull the lever, job done'. Matched the symbols, hit the lever, got shot by about 30 poisonous arrows. So i thought hmm ok, lets try that again with the symbols the other way around, didnt work, shot by more arrows. For the next 15 minutes i was spinning these statues around in every possible combination trying to get the damn door to open. When i do finally give up, i turn around to leave and try another quest when i notice there are 2 more sets of statues directly behind me.....

Facepalm.

[BluWolve]

Lack of sleep has left me unable to think quite well, but the first thing that comes to mind is this.


After about 18 hours of gameplay, I decided to spoil myself and buy a horse. As I was riding out of Whiterun heading towards Riverwood (my stash of books is there and I had some more to add to my library ) I saw a lady running towards me screaming "Help us please help us!" and then noticed two guards nocking arrows and aiming towards the sky. Oh how excited I was to have my first random encounter with a dragon!

Quickly I dismounted my horse and proceeded to nock my own arrow and line up my shot. There it was, a dragon headed in my direction, blasting a stream of firey breath straight towards ... my horse?


Needless to say my poor pony took off at a gallop towards the mountains, with the dragon hot on her heels. It was about this time that I found myself sprinting as fast as I could yelling "COME BACK!!" at the TV, 4:30 AM.


Don't worry folks, a happy ending was had by all! Ok well sort of....


After about 5 minutes I caught up to where my horse had gotten stuck on the mountainside and proceeded to loose arrow after arrow at the bastard who was torching my brand spanking new horse.


Finally I got it's attention and it came down to fight someone it's own size, I let out my rage and defended my horsies honor. As the dragon took one final blow from my (Exquisite) Scimitar, I let out a roar of victory.


That is when my Mrs threw a cushion at me and roared louder than any dragon possibly could to "Shut the hell up!"

[Vundi]

I got the angry giant orbital gold swing treatment, too. I was so high it looked like the zoomed in world map. Haha! I almost didn't mind being killed.

[bulletman]

I decided to take a swim in the northern Ice lakes only to get trapped under the solid ice on top. Guess what? I liv... No, I died.

Chassing a bunny rabit into a giants den wasn't the best idea either...

[Wildmn34]

Originally Posted by bulletman

Chassing a bunny rabit into a giants den wasn't the best idea either...

It's so easy for me to get distracted with things like that and end up in a really bad spot.

Butterflies, rabbits, elk... the list goes on and on. lol

[BBDrew84]

I am definitely guilty of running up to the first Giant I saw and tried to take it down, but with one feel swoop he stomped me into the ground.

I did just have a WTF moment, I went to Bleak Falls Temple and there is part of the a river that is flowing up hill. I went around the corner and I saw that and I just laughed because around the next corner the river was flowing down hill.

[Paka]

Originally Posted by Vundi

I got the angry giant orbital gold swing treatment, too. I was so high it looked like the zoomed in world map. Haha! I almost didn't mind being killed.

Yep, this here too. It treated my poor lil Imperial like a baseball and sent her absolutely out of the park!

Also, had a dragon attack this farm where two dark elf sisters lived. Guard almost finishes off the dragon before I can even get there, and afterwards complains how his cousin is off fighting dragons while he is stuck on guard duty. The dragon killed the younger dark elf girl too, and her sister, who was yelling at her for being lazy not too long before, is standing there over her corpse like "whatever!" and making casual conversational comments to me.

Oh, and of course the little kid that took out a hit on me. Still debating whether to off his dog as a lesson.

Saw what looked like a corpse in the hot springs at a distance, but nope, not a corpse. A male and female hunter stripped down enjoying a bath. So I ran off with the clothes on the bank.

ETA: Forgot, also the dumbass bandit who ran screaming at me how I picked a bad time to get lost, and proceeded to get one-shotted with a sword through the gut! The kill animation was so seemless that it looked like he ran full speed into my sword.

[DecadentBeaver]

The first dragon you face just west of Whiterun had me in stitches. After shooting arrows for a couple of minutes, it landed next to the tower. A guard ran up to it to attack, and the dragon picked him up in his mouth, shook him violently, then let him go. Needless to say, being hurled into a solid stone tower is a great way to die.

First time ever in an Elder Scrolls game, I have decided to use Archery. So I was chasinh an Elk tryin to kill him, when we both ran off a cliff to our deaths like Lemmings.

Sure I'll have many more moments.

[eldavido13]

I fast traveled to Dawnstar, I see a dragon a little ways away. Its fighting something I think guards maybe I cant see because of a cliff. I run over to help kill this Dragon, It was fighting 2 Giants!, I watched from the cliff and shot fireballs at it till it died, then the 2 giants(nearly dead) came after me. Running away and shooting fireballs worked well, 3 big kills at once it was great!

[Lord Zedd0]

I was doing the money glitch where you travel to the bottemles pit below winterhold. I noticed that the skeletons were back at their original places/ The skeleton holding the book : doors of oblivion (that money glitch) was resting at his pedistal. Suddenly the dragon appeared. It shouted his fire at me hitting the skeleton. The skeleton woke up and ran away!!

If only I could have captured it on video! Too funny!!

[Demolition D]

I was in the middle of a market, going through my items and dropped a sword. Then a guard walked by and stopped me. Told me not to leave any weapons around, someone could get hurt. Then it prompted me to respond ...

[Paka]

Originally Posted by Demolition D

I was in the middle of a market, going through my items and dropped a sword. Then a guard walked by and stopped me. Told me not to leave any weapons around, someone could get hurt. Then it prompted me to respond ...

Cool, that is another really neat touch! Now I'm going to have to go and throw all sorts of crap on the ground to see what they'll say. Hopefully this isn't like Harvest Moon where littering hurts friendship, haha!

[Failure System]

Originally Posted by Demolition D

I was in the middle of a market, going through my items and dropped a sword. Then a guard walked by and stopped me. Told me not to leave any weapons around, someone could get hurt. Then it prompted me to respond ...

Something similar happend to me. I wanted to skill my pickpocketing and was in the companions house and pickpocked some clothes from the sleeping people. As they were only 2-3 coins worth i just dropped them on one of the beds and several seconds later one of the companions woke up and started talking with me and said somethig like:
"Hey! they clothes over there! are they ours? or can i take them?"
and as i said no they arent mine and he can take them he he responded somethign like "Oh boy! that is the best day of my life!"

[SIMPLYMIDGET]

Originally Posted by Failure System

Something similar happend to me. I wanted to skill my pickpocketing and was in the companions house and pickpocked some clothes from the sleeping people. As they were only 2-3 coins worth i just dropped them on one of the beds and several seconds later one of the companions woke up and started talking with me and said somethig like:
"Hey! they clothes over there! are they ours? or can i take them?"
and as i said no they arent mine and he can take them he he responded somethign like "Oh boy! that is the best day of my life!"

I dropped a book outside my house...around 20 mins later I went back to drop off some goods...as I exited, two guys were arguing over the book. One guy then pulls out a silver dagger... the other guy just starts running away yelling "guards!!". the guy with the dagger picks up the book and starts walking off with it like nothing happened.

I wonder if i find the guy who took the book and pickpocket him, will it show up in his inventory?

[DecadentBeaver]

Originally Posted by Failure System

Something similar happend to me. I wanted to skill my pickpocketing and was in the companions house and pickpocked some clothes from the sleeping people. As they were only 2-3 coins worth i just dropped them on one of the beds and several seconds later one of the companions woke up and started talking with me and said somethig like:
"Hey! they clothes over there! are they ours? or can i take them?"
and as i said no they arent mine and he can take them he he responded somethign like "Oh boy! that is the best day of my life!"

That is epic! Might give it a go. Had another funny moment. Was up by Solitude, taking on Black Briar gang (think that's their name), amd once down to the last one, he was badly injured, then ran into the sea, and swam north further than the game would allow. Hope the coward freezes I thought. I returned to land, happy that a job had been well done, and then *thud* I turned around, and it was that same guy, he smacked me round the head with his mace! Used my dragon shout to kill him with such force, his body went back out to sea.

[SilentTalons]

Was in the bar in riverwood helping delphine and dropped some elven armour n orgnar comes up and asks can i have that armour thats laying on the ground ? :P i picked the opion to be an ass :P

[DecadentBeaver]

Just had a monet once again! On my way from Winterhold to Windhelm. As I was running along the road about to pass Fort Kastav, I noticed something in the sky coming towards me at some speed. I stopped, noticed it definitely was coming towards me and getting bigger. I very quickly realised that it was the body of a Wolf! The only thing I can think of, is a Giant smacked that good!

[shadowr4ven]

Originally Posted by BluWolve

That is when my Mrs threw a cushion at me and roared louder than any dragon possibly could to "Shut the hell up!"

oh man, I've been there!!! haha. Usually because I'll wear headphones at night and can't tell the volume of my voice

[bok249]

at level 2, my first encounter with one of those giants. I had no idea what to expect so i went in with dual flame spells active. Apparently he thought he was playing golf, and i was the golf ball, cause when that club hit me i got launched into orbit.

[Miss Informed]

I whacked a woolly mammoth on the butt with my mace. I got trampled, and yes, I did die tired, as I used up all my stamina trying to run.

[JackJumpsCandle]

I was sneaking around on the Emperor's ship ready to kill him. I was being a total stealthy ninja when, all of a sudden, an ancient dragon appears. He's totally wrecking all of the guards, but when he flies up for another pass, the guards magically discover me and kill me. Not cool.

[TheKerminator]

I was in Whiterun, going to the weapons shop near the gate with that woman (her name escapes me). I needed to use the grinder to sharpen my blade or something but she was on it, so I clicked A and she got off it. I sat down, and as I did I saw her to my left, she screamed and died. I got out of the grinder to try to figure out what happened, but nothing killed her that I could tell...guess she really wanted to use the grindstone... I reloaded of course...but that was really weird.

[Paka]

Well, here is another, though it is more the people of Riverwood who will be saying WTF? Damn dragon sure picked a perfect spot to bite the dust, right in the middle of the road! - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v5...nroadblock.jpg

Biggest issue I'm having with random dragons so far actually is that they are showing up in populated areas. I know I've lost one NPC already, and now I've got to go hunting around for bodies after killing them to see who else the dragon took down with it.

[Wildmn34]

Originally Posted by Paka

Well, here is another, though it is more the people of Riverwood who will be saying WTF? Damn dragon sure picked a perfect spot to bite the dust, right in the middle of the road! - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v5...nroadblock.jpg

Biggest issue I'm having with random dragons so far actually is that they are showing up in populated areas. I know I've lost one NPC already, and now I've got to go hunting around for bodies after killing them to see who else the dragon took down with it.

That reminds me of a scene out of the Flintstones. lol

[neonistje]

Engaging with a dragon making him land/crash near a gaint and the gaint killed him for me

[tompeeper]

I took off all my armor and was only wearing my underoos and a little girl said "you're naked!" and I laughed. She was so amused by my lack of clothes.

[bulletman]

So I'm in the hot springs/geysers Dragon lair and a random Dragon shows up and attacks me... Hell yeah, Werewolf boi vs two Dragons......... Dragons didn't land, couldnt attack them... Noooooo!!! I wanted some werewolf Chuck Noris shit to go down... On the flip side I did see a Mammoth get sent miles by a geyser.


My character is called Chuck Noris by the way.