Well I guess a major change in a series can lose some fans. I love how you mentioned that there was "no dildo" in GTA4. :P
I've never gotten far in GTA1 or 2 but I have played them. Maybe I will play through both of them when I get time.
I've been busy, I just noticed your message. I get that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but I don't see how you can't like GTA4. It seems impossible! Especially to a veteran to the series. I don't really believe any of the violence was ever cartoonish. The graphics have always been bad due to the limits of the consoles and the huge areas you can explore, but bad graphics aren't the same as cartoonish. Vice City was my favorite GTA until GTA4, and honestly, I would rather see Niko go to Vice than the rumored return to San Andreas.
Also, all of the games have been more realistic than the last. Except for a few things like jetpacks and other crazy things added for humor.